“Most of us are imprisoned by something. We’re living in darkness until something flips on the switch.” Wynonna Judd
I love the idea of having someone to walk beside in this life.
I love that we get to be a witness to one another’s lives.
And I love that we get to share the joys and sorrows of life with another human being.
But the institution of marriage is sort of a peculiar thing to me…
Marriage was originally created as an alliance between two families, where the property rights, money, and bloodlines could be secured within the ...continue reading...
I know I’m behind the times, but I just recently started watching the TV series, Breaking Bad. Our binging has paid off because we’re already into the third season. I’m watching the other night and there’s this scene where Skyler (the wife) is lamenting to her divorce attorney about her marriage and pending divorce. She’s explaining that no matter what step she takes, she’s feeling like she’s suffocating and feels paralyzed. She looks really distraught.
To which her lawyer brilliantly responds, “I am half as qualified and twice the rate of a therapist. What is your question for me?”...continue reading...
“You’re getting the results of your stories.” Angela Lauria
If you’re healing after a breakup, you inevitably have a story about what happened and why the relationship ended. Take a moment and think about that story. When someone asks you the question, “What happened?” what do you say?
I believe that what you’re saying is the truth of your experience, but I also believe that many times we can be blind to the full story. That story can also be the very thing that keeps us stuck after a breakup.
When we feel stuck, a typical reaction is to ...continue reading...
“Once you know better, you do better.” Dr. Maya Angelou
Once you begin to explore why some past painful relationships didn’t last, you may be able to see the role you had in contributing to the creation of that experience:
Maybe you overlooked something you shouldn’t have.
Maybe you tried to convince yourself you could make the unworkable work.
Maybe you stayed too long in a relationship out of fear of being alone.
Maybe you put your partner’s happiness before your own.
Maybe you stayed for the children.
But you did those things because you wanted love. You wanted ...continue reading...
“But even when I stop crying, even when we fall asleep…this will leave another scar. No one will see it. No one will know. But it will be there. And eventually, all of the scars will have scars, and that’s all I’ll be – one big scar of a love gone wrong.” Amanda Grace, But I Love Him
Physical abuse can be easy to spot. There’s no denying bruised ribs, a swollen eye or as is the case with my loving and strong mother-in-law, burned skin all over one of her arms; a reminder that never goes away.
“The trouble is not really in being alone, it’s being lonely.” Christine Feehan
I was almost ten years into my first marriage when I realized that even though I had a husband that loved me, family and plenty of friends, I still felt isolated and very alone.
Throughout the last week, I’ve spoken to several women with similar experiences.
We’re not alone; we’re never really alone in these experiences that we don’t talk much about to one another.
Camille married her husband out of fear and knew from the beginning that there was no soulful connection between them. But ...continue reading...
“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.” Mary Oliver
When hearts are broken, it hurts. I’ve lost jobs. I’ve lost friendships. I’ve lost my footing, but nothing kicked me in the stomach and opened me up the way a broken heart did.I know what it’s like to get your heart broken. I know what it’s like to not quite know where your broken heart ends and your own brokenness begins. I know what it feels like to want an unworkable relationship to ...continue reading...